(When we play Taboo . . . It can get really wrong.)

THE WORD IS UNICORN

"Okay, um, if you are a vergin then this will put it's head in 
your lap, and you want to pet it. . ."

-Tad

 
"I love Doc Holliday, he so cool. . ."

"HE'S A PHYCOTIC DENTEST!!!!!!" 

(People unclear on the concept)

 
"So one of Satin's Imps and her friend come up to me and says, 

'We're confused, your characters have no clans.'  

So I figure it's like our fault 'cause we made these 
characters and we were tired so I take the sheet from her 
and I see that right next to the word CLAN it says 'Catiff'.  
So I look back up at them and I tell them,

"It says you're Catiff."

And she says, "We know, but we have no clans."

"Well that's right, you're Catiff."

"I understand that . . . But we have no clans." 

And this goes on for like five min. and I'm trying to explain 
and finally I'm talking VERY SLOOOWLY.

"Sometimes girls. . . there are vampires. . . and they're made. . . 
and they don't have a clan . . . 'cause they don't know their 
clan. . . and they'll never know . . . and these vampires are 
called 'KAY-TIFF'."

(A lesson in futility and waisting time due to sevear bordum on both sides.)

 
PUPPY:	Shaw-me-say is actually a proper pronunciation... 
   they list like 4.
PEACOCK:	Uh no, it's not.
PUPPY:	::archs a brow:: I go grab my PHB.
PEACOCK:	Phonetics have nothing to do with it . . .
PUPPY:	SHA-me-say is listed as correct.
PEACOCK:	Besides.  Have you ever noticed that "Phonetic" 
    is spelled WITH A  FUCKING "PH"???? DOESN'T THAT 
    SEEM A LITTLE TWISTED TO YOU???
PUPPY:	Heh. Bad tangent, no biscuit.
PEACOCK:	It's a LANGUAGE.  And I've heard from people who 
    speak that language that shaw-me-say is wrong. Or would 
    you rather trample all over their cultural heratige?
PUPPY:	Um, hate to break it to you but there are about 15 different 
   slavic dialects with different words for vampire... why not for 
   Tzimisce?
PEACOCK:	It's Hungarian. . .	I'M Hungarian. . .And I say "shaw-me-say" 
   sounds STUPED!
PUPPY:	ZJIM-ee-see, or SHA-me-see, or SHA-me-say, depending on 
   geogaphic location.
PEACOCK:	tell me that when your Hungarian. . . and maybe I'll believe you.
PUPPY:  Zmmeeeseee is worse.
PEACOCK:	It's far more fun to say.
PUPPY:	heh. It's wrong, too.
PEACOCK:	Look . . .I know the evil that is "PHonetics".  You've fallen into
   their trap.  It's very sad.  But I'm telling you that it's a LANGUAGE and
   you can't apply your out there, twisted, PHonetic logic to it.
PUPPY:	Ok. Do you speak Hungarian, or whatever dialect Hungarians speak?
PEACOCK:	I can say "go fuck your dog" . . .

  .  .  .

PEACOCK:	It's an natural in born thing . . .
   	Harry Hudini
   	Bela Lagosi
   	and me.

 
Wyrm Taint?  NoNo, correct grammar is just a..er..certain kinda smell 
that Pentex Agents give off.

 
I Came up with something last night at Dinner you might think is 
amusing,or scary. Adam and I went out to Dinner and we decide to 
go to a TGI Friday's resturant for disert.  Now the Friday's up here 
really freaks me out because iIt's EXACTLY like the one in 
Torrence. . .

If there's a difference, it's a matter of inches.  

EVERYTHING is in EXACTLY the same place and looks EXACTLY (or 
really really *&%# close) the same. . .So I express to Adam that 
this fact wierds me out and he makes some comment about the 
Technocracy. . .

And I realise. . .

TGIF doesn't really stand for Thank Goodness It's Friday's. . .

It's Technocracy Gormets In Franchise. . .

  
"A pooka lemure??? . . ." ::pause:: "What's a pooka?"
 
 
 
(Random soliciters on the phone. . .)
 
Michelle: Hello?
Caller: Hi . . .(yadda ya yadda ya pitch pitch)
Michelle: One moment please. . .
Caller: Sure.
Michelle: Hay Bill?
Bill: Yeah?
Michelle: This guys offering us. . .(Yadda ya yadda ya explaine 
   explaine) You want to talk to him?
Bill: Eh.  No thank you.
Adam: Tell him we're dead.
Michelle: I'm sorry sir, I've been instructed to inform you that
   we're all dead here.  But thank you for your intrest.
 
(Storytellers from HELL!)
 
Flamboyant gay guy, represed white guy . . . . . 

Uh, no.


(A fundamental truth)

Bree: Our cigars came five in a box. . .you can't get whores like that.

Adam: Well, at least not in our income bracket. . .

 
"I think we have to explaine to Todd the subtleties of humor and what is
and isn't propper."

"Excuse me??? Who cast him as "Projectile Vomit Boy"?
 
 
After Con mayhem. . .

Nikki: Hay Bill?  Where's all the leftover soda?
Bill: In the oven.
Nikki: Really?
Bill/Jeff/Michelle: ::all agree the soda has been stored in the oven::
Nikki: The oven that I just turned on?
Bill: Oops.


 
Jeff helps Michelle move. . .

Jeff: where do I put this?
Michelle: Over there.
Jeff: By the alter?
Michelle: It's not an alter its nick-nacks on some crates.
Jeff: But it looks like an alter.
Michelle: Well it's purely coincidental I asure you.
Jeff: Yeah, most magick is. . .


 
No! You must room with us Dave!  
You understand the inherent suckyness of people!.

-Nikki
 
((Discution about prepairing for Con))

Nikki: I meen we've got people who know how to make certain
	character sheets, Adam M. can do the wraiths.  And I
	can do every boggen Jim needs.
Peanutgallery: You ARE every boggen Jim needs.
Michelle: ((sings)) o/~o/~ You're every boggen it's all in yoooooou!o/~o/~

 

  "If the rules won't let you do it, FIND DIFFERENT RULES!"

  "I'm not a power gamer. I just engineer better platforms for creative
mass destruction."

    "Bushi die with honor. Toreadors beg with style. Think about... do you
see more Toreadors or Bushi in the average Camarilla city? Darwin had a
sense of humor after all."

    "Kewl.... I finally managed to CoLocate my 9mm with that ICBM. Now
what the hell do I DO with it?"

    "The true tweak character: a kami cyborg bastet/kinfolk revenant
infernalist fomor mummy Rom thaumaturgist true mage." (I actually did a
character sheet for this once).

     "If a  corax got with a werespider, what would the metis look like?"



"It doesn't matter that you've seen a production of _Hamlet_ where all the
parts are plaied by black lesbians.  You've been to a place where the
laws of physics don't apply!"


   Some friends of mine used to work at Interplay, for gamers by former 
gamers, and their project at the time was a game called "Starfleet Academy", 
somehow working on it ment that they met Dan and Andrew Greenburg.  A 
while ago I was over at the house and Dan stoped by on his way somewhere 
else.  The bunch of us, Myself, Adam, Nikki, Bill, Rusty, and Dan sat around 
talking for a while and the topic consisted of reminising about old video and 
computer games.  That led to a disscution of what games they had all worked 
on.  Dan made a comment about how he mostly does critical thinking games 
for children.  At which point Adam busted up laughing saying, "So you wrote 
the Malkavian Clanbook, and now you're onto critical thinking games for 
children.  That's twisted." At which point Dan smiled and said, "I'm helping to 
mold minds."


> p.s.  It should be noted that I can seperate reality from fantasy and I
> realize that I am not in fact really Thorin Zarn.  As you, who know me
> well, will confirm I am in fact Phil Cravitz, a post modern
> anthropamortphic construct of reality personified and not in fact a
> neo-palegic repobate.  Thank you.

-PHIL/THORIN

Nikki: Hay Dave?
Dave: Yeah?
Nikki: People Suck
Dave: Yeah.

Nikki

((Storyteller sarcasum is often lost on your average player.))
Player:Can I have GOOD character please?
Nikki:oh I'm sorry all the character's in this game SUCK. Go home
Player: Oh, then can I play someone violent?

-Nikki


James: ::mumbles in his sleep::.


Dave: Did he just say "Wet pick axe"???


At the food table ( where people PAY for food)
Player: Can I mooch a coke?
Nikki: Uh. what do you mean?
PLayer: You GIVE *me* a coke.

Nikki




Best way to make the STs happy:


"Hey, can I play a mortal?"


(Gamers love E-mail)
From: strikes@adams.com
To: Niki@lizard.lare
Subject: Okay, make fun of me!!!

You you you....HEY...so you think it's funny to pick on the little
blonde woman, do ya?!  "You're a retard Deb, a funny retard, but still..."
Well laugh while you can Kindred...and watch out, cuz maybe at the next
full moon, your HEAD will IMPLODE!!!  Maybe I have enough Arete to do it,
maybe I don't, but ask yourself this, Gangrel babe --

DO YA FEEL LUCKY?!

Giggling maniacally,

Deb

(ASENATH LIVES!!!)